Negotiating is as much a part of daily life as it is a part of sales. As you meet and interact with people throughout the day, often these interactions are inclusive of a negotiation. What you consider to be acceptable behavior from your children is often the result of a negotiation that you have had with them. Which movie you are going to see with your wife, who’s turn it is to take out the garbage, or should you buy that new coffee table are all types of negotiations that you probably have with your family or friends every day. Thus the term, “negotiating your way through the day.”

While some may say that there is a big difference between these negotiations and a sales negotiation, I submit that they are generally the same. The negotiating parties may be less familiar, but essentially, there is give and take amongst the parties involved to ultimately achieve a desirable outcome. This is an important point to acknowledge, because how you approach and interact with the other parties in a negotiation, any negotiation, will determine its outcome.

Successful negotiators take into account not only their needs, but also the needs of the other involved parties. This is important. Thoughtfulness is very significant in a negotiation. Those of you who are married know exactly what I am talking about. This is because of how emotion relates to negotiating. Whether it is an emotional attachment to the person you are dealing with, or an emotional attachment to what you are negotiating for, emotion plays a big role in the negotiating process.

Another concept that effective negotiators understand is the value of negotiating. There is a time to negotiate, but it is important to know when it is time to stop negotiating. I am sure that we have all seen many sales go bad simply because the person who was handling the sales negotiation did not know when to stop negotiating, even if they had already achieved their real goal. They just wanted to see if they could get one more thing. It is as if some people negotiate for the sport of it. And, while it may be fun, like a game, to negotiate, you need to keep in mind, what are you negotiating for?

A negotiation with no object but to win, is simply an argument. Only an argument has a winner and a loser. In a successful negotiation, everyone gets what they want. That’s the point of a negotiation, to come to an agreement, a meeting of the minds.

You should be clear on what it is that you are trying to achieve in a negotiation, before you ever enter into one. Otherwise you can end up achieving something that is truly of little value to you at the expense of giving up something that is of great value. For example, would you give up $100 on a $20,000 vehicle on your lot, at any point in a negotiation to definitively sell a car right at that moment? If you said yes, then you value the sale of the $20,000 car more than the additional $100 in gross.

I am not saying that you need to discount to win a negotiation. Simply, know what is really important to you during that negotiation. I propose that in this example, $100 is not as important to any dealer as making the sale. Problem is, in real life you can’t always tell if the $100 will actually conclude the negotiations. So the negotiations continue. As the saying goes, if you don’t know where you’re going, when you get there, you don’t even know that you’re there.

In my experience, I have seen many different types of sales and negotiating techniques. Those that take the customer’s interest to heart are not only the most successful in sales, but have the best rapport with their customers. Therefore, they have the best CSI ratings and the most customer referrals and the most repurchasing customers. Those that intend just to squeeze as much out of the customer as possible, though they may make this sale, will lose credibility with the customer and therefore lose future sales from this customer and any referrals that this customer may have made.

Today, most manufacturers and dealers alike realize that a “customer for life” is what will bring you the most benefit now, and in the future. Persistence and consistency are the keystones to running a successful business with longevity. Even as an individual salespro, you must surely realize that a few years of effective negotiating and consistency can allow you to reap large rewards and easier times in the future as customers and their referrals return to buy from you again and again. But, it is a commitment to customer service, to respecting both your customer as well as yourself and what you do. It is a commitment to your future.